Rare, Collectible, & Otherwise

Tag: Claremore (Page 113 of 115)

Rcvd yr msg. Cnt ndrstnd t.

I received this message this morning: “Got bk lft fdbk tks” – and I don’t know what to think.

Texting

All thumbs? Buy a vowel.

Oh, I decyphered the line, all right. I’m decent at word puzzles, and this one certainly isn’t a head-knocker.

I’m confused as to what was saved by leaving out the vowels. Time? Maybe five or six seconds. Effort? How many calories are really expended by the thumb-pressing? (I’m assuming the email came by way of a smart-phone keypad.)

OMG!

Right away, it made me think of the Miller Light commercial, in which a man is seen texting in front of the bartender, who gives him a choice. He punctuates his answers with “smiley face” and “LOL…” – to which she responds, “when you learn to talk like a grownup, come back and I’ll give you a Miller Light.”

LOL…

“Got book left feedback. Thanks.”

I typed it, and it took less than three seconds. (I got nervous and had to start over.)

This takes just a little longer: “I got the book and left feedback. Thanks.” The phones all have full-keypads now, don’t they? Even with the tiny keys and my aging thumbs, I can complete words and sentences quickly.

Nt a prblm.

If speed isn’t the issue, the only alternative is vowel discrimination, and I don’t want to get started on that one.

===
Tulsa Metro News online.

What soda? Diet Coke bubbles up.

It was bound to happen.

Diet Coke

Movin' on up. Diet Coke.

My wife delighted in pointing out that I found it impossible to drive past a QuikTrip store without stopping for a bottle of Diet Coke. Hey. I had a thirst.

I don’t do that so much anymore, but it’s mostly because I don’t have so many children-related driving expeditions.

My soft drink conversion came during the early days of dieting, a lifelong battle that saw me switch from regular sugar-based drinks to low calorie counterparts. Pepsi had been my carbonated choice, but Diet Pepsi? Sorry, could not do that.

I never liked Coke. At a young age, I had already become such a connoisseur of soda that I could rattle off the subtle differences in half a dozen brands. Diet Coke lost the harsh and stinging quality of its sugary predecessor.

The low-cal version has overtaken Pepsi as the #2 selling soft drink. The official numbers are expected out Thursday, but indications are that Pepsi has lost its easy chair among the nation’s couch potatoes.

Proud as I am to be a difference-maker, there are other factors that led to the change. Soft drink sales are down overall (I told you I didn’t drive as much), and the sales of various other beverages cut back the Pepsi market share, along with that of top-selling Coke. Number one just didn’t lose as much.

So, raise your can of Red Bull and celebrate, and let the sodas battle for top-ranking drink. It’s a soda fountain of youth.

Sure’n I recall a fain eve full o’ St. Paddy.

The night was party-perfect and I was helping host one of the bigger celebrations in Tulsa. It was Eire-crazy, enough so that we had to post an Irishman at the front door. There was a line outside.

St. Pat's hats

For the US Irish: a BIG day.

A man and his daughter worked their way to the front, and Robbie says in his fain Dublin brogue, “Aye, the fire marshall says we’re full-up.”

“I see you are,” the man answered. “I’m the fire marshall.”

I was summoned immediately, the words “fire marshall” shouted into my ear over the blaring Irish music. Yikes, I thought, in an adopted Irish brogue. I ran to the front.

Well, ‘ran’ is an overstatement. I leaned and elbowed my way through the human-carwash to where Robbie stood. The man in front of the podium introduced himself and said he was happy to see that we were limiting entry.

The way he said it made it clear that – in his scanning of our happy crowd – we were clearly over capacity. I hadn’t counted but I figured it was a cinch we were. As fire marshall, the man had the option of marching everyone outside and then counting the re-entry until our maximum seating capacity was reached.

He didn’t.

He leaned in and said to me, “My daughter has never been to a St. Patrick’s Day celebration before. I thought we’d try your corned beef.”

I was nodding my head and smiling like a fool.

“If you can find us a table,” he continued, “we can eat a quick meal and you can get back to your little party.”

I told him I’d be back to escort him there presently.

Seating had been a premium since before noon, and those standing about were eyeing potential tables like Irish-vultures. Amazingly, I found a group just starting to push back their chairs.

I grabbed a waitress and had her stake a claim while motioning for another to quickly come clear away the dishes. Another run through the robo-wash and I directed the fire marshall and guest to their sparkling spot.

St. Paddy’s Day continued uninterrupted: the Irish music blared, the bagpipers paraded, the green beer poured, and corned beef was consumed.

I covered the cost of the meal. It was the least I could do. He realized we were trying to do the best we could in a crazy situation. After a smile and wink, the fire marshall went out the door.

I hope his daughter enjoyed her first St. Paddy’s. It was quite the party for us.

A decade later, I think about donning the kilt and finding a celebration… but the bad knee won’t hold up standing too long, and the workday Friday begins at the usual hour.

The restaurant business is a tough way to make a living, about as tough as profiting from book sales.

But there are days I miss the raucous, happy bleeting of bagpipers making their way through my establishment.

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