Rare, Collectible, & Otherwise

Author: admin (Page 161 of 220)

Are we ready for Irene?

ABC News wants to know. I thought it was a silly question for the anchor to pose, since the fancy graphics clearly showed the hurricane would barely skirt the eastern states, and certainly won’t suddenly swoop into the midsection of the US.

Years ago, I was asked to apply for a job with Associated Press Radio, a news network based in Washington DC. It was flattering to be asked, but I wasn’t sure I wanted to move to the east coast.

Applicants for the job opening were asked to write a sample newscast as it would be delivered over the radio network. I thought it over and then purposely tanked the exam. I wrote a newscast as I thought one should rightly be delivered, with less emphasis on the mundane political coverage that infects most national newscasts, and more attention to non-political events.

You see, I wasn’t sure the east coast was the place for me. Nothing against the geography or the people. It’s the news media, and the self-perpetuating notion that whatever happens in the nation’s capital is of immediate concern to the entire population outside the beltway. Networks of all brands regularly waste coverage time to inform us of what committees are meeting tomorrow, or what reports will be released. Here’s a news flash: We just don’t care.

Tell us something interesting, or something that we can use in our lives. Give us a report about something in OUR world, instead of assuming your insulated bubble-universe is the center of ours too.

Hurricane Irene is reminding me that I made the right choice all those years ago. Had I written the newscast the way the AP wanted newscasts written, I might have gotten the job and then likely would have spent my life trying to change the east coast bias of the national network news. Talk about a frustrating and futile task.

Terry Moran, one of the co-anchors of ABC’s Nightline program, peered into the camera last night and asked dramatically, “Are YOU ready for Hurricane Irene?”

Who are you talking to, Terry?

Lying on the couch watching the fear-franchising reports from up and down the east coast, I wondered if Mr. Moran believed he was addressing a regional audience instead of the entire US. What will we need to do here in Tulsa, Oklahoma to get ready for the hurricane, Terry? Nail boards over our windows? Bag up a supply of sand?

Where was Nightline when the MidSouth was ravaged by tornadoes this spring? There was plenty of time for the ABC reporters to set up their “team coverage” for a weather system that was accurately predicted by meteorologists – in the same way the track of Hurricane Irene has been charted in advance.

Of course, when the tornadoes touch down the networks scurry in to record the aftermath.

Those of us in what the coastal residents call the “flyover states” have become accustomed to getting the short-shrift when it comes to media attention. NPR calls their afternoon program Talk of the Nation, implying that their talkfest is a summation of the country’s current water-cooler gossip. In truth, with rare exception, what they provide is talk of the Beltway and tangential politics.

No doubt, Terry Moran was well-intentioned when he posed his question to the viewers, thinking in the manner of NPR’s myopic programming that his coverage would have the entire nation hanging on his every word. Mr. Moran has spent his entire life in the vacuum of Washington DC and its politics, with ventures out into the fire-zones. It is easy to be a journalist while holding an airline ticket to anywhere in the world where a disastrous event has just occurred.

The 80mph winds associated with Hurricane Irene are no greater than those visited numerous times over course of this summer through the MidSouth. Sure, Irene’s winds are sustained, but the real danger will come from the storm surge – the water.

The east coast media keep mentioning “Katrina” as a hammer to drive home the significance of the weather system. Okay, it is a hurricane, one taking a fairly rare path toward the populous northeast – but weather events happen across the US daily.

They’re only important though, when they affect Mr. Moran’s drive to work.

Ticket-buying: Paying extra for the work.

When self-service gasoline pumps became prevalent (believe me, there was a time when there existed such a thing as a gas station attendant, who did more than sit behind a counter reading a magzine and collecting payments. In addition to filling the tank, he would check the oil, clean the windows, and look over the tires to see if they needed air…), stations often offered discounts to motorists filling their own tanks. A couple of cents-per-gallon cheaper.

It allowed the attendant to fill someone else’s car, while not missing a sale.

Grocery stores have the self-serve scanners that usually have shorter lines, mostly because a lot of people are afraid of the technology. Unlike the gasoline stations, though, there are no discounts applied.

The internet age has introduced the sale of event-tickets online. Similar to the self-check grocery store register, it allows for the purchase without an attendant. Like the food market, there are no discounts for doing the work of a theater box-office teller.

YOU PAY A CONVENIENCE FEE.

That’s right. For doing all the work that the employee does behind the glass, sliding the money one direction and a ticket the other, the buyer is required to pay for the privilege of doing the labor. $1.25 per ticket.

It may not seem a lot, but it amounts to a $5 bill for four tickets purchased, which is a down-payment on any theater food item.

There are times that the theater has lines leading up to the box office. On the other hand, there are times when it is possible to walk directly to the entrance, buy a ticket, and cruise directly inside.

I’m betting that this evening there won’t be a line.

Even if there is, I’ve saved myself five-dollars worth of aggravation by buying my ticket at the theater, instead of recalling how I had to pay to do the work. Convenient? I don’t think so.

I can can push a banknote through the opening a lot easier than typing all the info required to buy it online.

And sometimes, the kid behind the glass smiles and says

‘Thanks.’

Opportunities: catching a rarity.

Okay, I’ll admit they are not quite so rare as hitting the Powerball lottery. Not even as rare as smiles at a Tulsa City Council meeting. I was in the crowd, sitting behind home plate Thursday night when Scott Beerer came to the plate for the Drillers.

I slipped out of the bookstore a little early, hoping to take advantage of a slight break in the heat for an evening at ONEOK Field. The Arkansas Naturals were in town, but the team wasn’t as important as the chance to watch a little baseball.

Sitting directly in front of me was a young couple – 19 or 20-years old at most – making goo-goo eyes at each other and occasionally giving each other too-passionate kisses. I had to look between the tops of their conjoined heads to see the batter. My tickets were for seats five rows back from the home plate backscreen.

The Drillers already had two errors by the time the first inning was over, and they seemed to have a bead on Tulsa’s pitcher, spraying hits all over the place. Finally, in the third inning, Tulsa got back-to-back home runs from Tommy Field and Ben Paulsen – and that changed the momentum.

It isn’t every day a baseball fan gets to see back-to-back home runs at the professional level. Heck, it is pretty rare at any level. It’s fun when it’s the home team hitting them.

And then, in the fifth, the bases are loaded. As far as the game is concerned, all the team wants is a base hit – a chance to drive in some runs. The fans, and – let’s face it – the team want a grand slam.

Hitting a home run is hard enough. Opportunities to hit a home run with the bases loaded come around occasionally, but are usually squandered in trying too hard.

Thursday night, ONEOK Field, fifth inning, Scott Beerer at the plate – bases loaded. Came the pitch and the solid contact. Every one of us in the stands (except the two in front of me) knew it had a chance. It went, and went. And it was over the fence.

The first time, in all my years of watching baseball games – even on television – that I had witnessed a grand slam home run.

As I said, there are things more rare. Some things considered rare, like an eclipse of the sun, can be predicted with accuracy. Even a pitcher that completes a shutout has had the chance to do it, every time he steps on the mound.

For a batter to hit a home run, the bases have to first be loaded. And then – he has to hit the ball out over the fence.

It is a rare, rare thing.

I’m glad I was there to see it.

As for the young couple, a bit of advice: there are numerous opportunities in life to steal a kiss, or to steal a base. Chances to see a slam in person shouldn’t be squandered.

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