Rare, Collectible, & Otherwise

Author: admin (Page 101 of 220)

Gummed up, by Gum…

Remember getting your driver’s license? The test? That first driver’s license photograph? As noted here previously, times change.

I read somewhere that teenagers don’t aspire to drive cars like they used to. Don’t remember what the percentages were, but in my own case, I counted the days until the Big Sixteenth, which meant I could get my license.

In fact, I wanted to drive so badly that I did it anyway, with a secretly acquired key to that big-finned black Chevrolet. That was so long ago that my first driver’s license didn’t have my picture on it. They were made out of some kind of fuzzy thick paper that allowed for the easy changing of the year of birth. Not that I know anything about that. Can’t do it anymore, in this day and age, when things are different.

According to the item, the cost of gasoline was cited as one reason why an increasing number of teens are disinclined to become drivers. Lack of a car was another. Some just had a general malaise about the whole idea of getting behind the wheel.

It seemed like everyone wanted to drive when I was young. You’d dream about the car, and pick out a radio – or stereo, if you could afford one. You might sit out in the car after dinner, just listening to music and maybe wiping the dashboard down in case a speck of dust might have settled there.

Don’t think I was fanatical, really. But my friends joked that I changed jobs the way they changed cars and I kept cars like I was expecting a gold watch when I retired from my driving career. I’ve had the Firebird over a decade.

Just spent half an hour and nearly ten bucks trying to high-pressure wash the black dots of tree sap from the red paint. Sweetgum tree. Not so sweet to park under. Honestly, I should have done the wash-off a couple of weekends ago, but didn’t. Now, it’s baked on. My pants legs are soaked and my shoes are squishy with water from the overspray at the car wash. Still wouldn’t come clean. At least it was a nice evening for a washjob, especially considering the time of year. In fact, there was a nice cooling breeze as I blasted the water around and I was surprised to see a hot air balloon drifting over BA as I drove to the auto parts store.

O’Reilly’s has an aerosol-spray bug and tar cleaner – on sale, thankfully – which also promised to remove tree sap, that I grabbed for another go at it tomorrow.

Who’d a thought? When I visit the shopping centers, I park the car at the far end of the north forty so I don’t get a door ding, and then all but ruin the paint by leaving it under the tree beside the driveway.

Back in the day (which means about a lifetime ago) I used to enjoy washing the car. Not an everyday kind of thing, but more of a non-chore that needed to be done somewhat regularly. Back then it was inside and out. Today? Not so much. There are lots of things I’d rather be doing with my time.

But – by gum – I’ll be washing again tomorrow. By sweetgum, that is.

The street should be reopened by Monday, and all the dinosaur-looking yellow machines should be parked somewhere besides right in front of the shop door… so – Come visit!

McHuston

Booksellers & Irish Bistro
Rose District
122 South Main St. Broken Arrow OK!

Nyuk Nyuk. A funny thing happened…

Humor.

It’s a funny thing. And I mean that literally, but not completely. That’s because what one person sees as a real knee-slapper another person might find annoying.

Keystone cops. Three Stooges. Legends. Sure, but I don’t think I ever laughed once. Slapstick just isn’t my thing. I hear people laughing (probably pre-taped and added in post-production) on the Funny Home Videos show, but I usually just cringe. I feel horrible for those people who tumble off the stage, ride their skateboards into the sides of parked cars, or slide down the snow-covered hill into a crotch-killing signpost.

Why don’t I see the humor in that?

Same reason a comedian named Steven Wright bombed in Tulsa years ago. I’d seen him on the Tonight Show and laughed out loud. Rare stuff for me. He followed a manic, frantic, prop-using funnyman on stage. Steven Wright’s brand of humor was a little more cerebral. Not brainiac stuff, really. But his droll delivery combined with his off-the-wall observations worked for me. When I saw him, he looked just like he does in the accompanying image.

Example (delivered in a deadpan, straight-face): Went home last night. Accidentally put my car key in the door lock. Turned it and the house started. So… I took it for a drive around the block.

The club was called Jokers. I was one of the only ones in the audience that night that laughed out loud. A few minutes after his set, I glanced to the side and saw Mr. Wright standing next to me. I apologized for the crowd, and admitted that I thought he was hilarious. He thanked me for the support. He had heard my laugh in the otherwise private-conversation-invested audience.

The humor-spectrum is the reason that so many different types of comedians can find success. There are that many people who find the various routines hilarious.

Tonight, I laughed out loud. The television is on in the office while I do some bookwork. (Book store, bookwork: get it? Yuk-yuk-yuk! Puns… the humor genre universally considered unfunny.) The CBS program Elementary is showing and Sherlock Holmes (I can only watch television based on literary fiction. –Joking) responded to a question posed by his assistant Watson.

Holmes, describing a remodeled wall in a home: …and the decomposing body caused a concave bulge in the wallboard.

Watson: You’re sure his body was hidden behind the wall?

Holmes, looking hesitant: Pretty sure.

The camera jumps to the interior of the house, where a gaping hole has been punched in the sheetrock and a body-shaped black-plastic-wrapped package is clearly visible. And it’s clear that the answer Holmes gave was purposely-driven, perfectly-timed:

Understatement.

I laughed out loud.

Realized immediately, that – just like the Steven Wright portion of that night at the comedy club – I was probably not in the majority in enjoying that humor.

So, I’m sitting here thinking: It’s funny how humor is so funny. And its just as funny how some humor is not-so-funny.

Some serious thoughts, there.

Makes me laugh.

Come visit!

McHuston

Booksellers & Irish Bistro
Rose District
122 South Main St. Broken Arrow, OK!

An iCure for iSick iPads.

Somebody in my impressionable youth told me, “If you can’t fix it with a hammer, get a bigger hammer.” Amazingly enough, I’ve had that work for me on occasion.

Usually doesn’t have anything to do with delicate computer technology though. I’m not sure a bigger hammer would have brought my waterlogged cellphone back to life.

Imagine my surprise then, when I did a search on iPad troubleshooting. The symptoms? Where the screen should be displaying white, was a dull red. Not just backgrounds. The shades of white in photographs and other images were the wrong color too.

She admitted that she had dropped the iPad. It was kind of slippery, she said. It may have come out of her hands. Once.

This revelation is being shared – not as a public shaming for letting an iPad hit the ground – but as a tutorial on how the thing can be repaired.

With a hammer.

Actually, I didn’t take a hammer to it, but I probably would have if I’d had one handy. In this day and age, when we have trouble with something, the first thing we do is Google it. Which is exactly what I did.

Unbelievably, the search results brought up a string of conversations written by folks with the same glowing red iPad screens, all of whom admitted the tablet had been dropped. Not so unbelievably, many of them blamed the baby, a neighbor, or their mother-in-law.

Almost every posting was bragging about having repaired their iPad by:

SMACKING IT ON THE BACK.

I immediately had a mental image of a newborn iPad being readied for its journey into the great computer world and receiving that life-bringing Smack! Picked up the tablet and gave it a whack. Nothing. Whack. Nothing. Third whack. Nothing.

Back to YouTube. The image is of an actual video in which a successful computer repair person brought their sickly iPad back to health with a hammer. (If you can’t fix it with a hammer…) Picked up the iPad. No hammer at the ready, so I grabbed the salt shaker from the table. Tap. Tap. Double Tap. Nothing.

Back to YouTube. After rereading those really happy people who revived their beloved tablets with the Smack-Method, I thought I’d give it another try.

Baby slaps. SMACK.

Red gone. Color correct.

iPad: Back in business.

The moral here?

It would follow the lines of that bigger hammer thing, but would include some newborn slaps and a salt shaker – which sound kinda like a bad science fiction movie plot.

Always happy when things work out, however crazily!

Come visit!

McHuston

Booksellers & Irish Bistro
Rose District
122 South Main Street, Broken Arrow OK!

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